How to Get and Keep Parents on Your Side

 By Deann Marin of The Best of Teacher Entrepreneurs II

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I have observed many colleagues who are uncomfortable letting their hair down, so to speak, causing them to seem aloof and unapproachable. They feel as if they are above their students and parents. It shows in the way they deal with them. They will never admit that they’ve made a mistake, and if a child points something out to them, they become defensive, angry. and mean.  When this occurs, the kids and parents feel alienated  and you will have an uphill battle for the rest of the year.

One of the main things that I realized, after years of teaching is that parents need you to care about their child, they want you to make their learning experience interesting, challenging and fun. The best way to do this is to make sure their little one knows that you are there to listen, and support them with positive reinforcement and encouragement. It’s also important that they realize you are human, you  make mistakes, and you can laugh at yourself. Once you’ve established a good rapport with the kids, and they like you, the parents will like you as well. They will do just about anything for you and you will be able to maintain the optimal environment for learning.

When you meet parents, greet them with a sincere smile and make small talk. Express how much you enjoy working with the children, it is important to be upbeat, even if you have something negative to say. Begin with a positive comment about Johnny, especially if he is having issues, tell the parent in a supportive manner, For instance, suppose Johnny is talkative, he shouts out answers, talks to friends when you’re teaching a lesson, and is constantly fooling around. You know the type. You should NEVER begin with the negatives. If you begin the discussion of Johnny’s behavior on a negative note, you will turn the parents off and you will lose their support and quite possibly turn Johnny off to learning. End by saying something complimentary.

For example: "Hi  Mr. and Mrs. Jones, Johnny is such a good kid, he’s respectful, finishes his work, he has loads of friends, a good sense of humor and I really enjoy teaching him. As you know, he is all boy and full of energy. He can be a bit talkative and sometimes disruptive because he shouts out answers without raising his hand. I’ve talked about this with him, but he is still a having a tough time. Perhaps you could speak with him when you get a chance. I know that he will improve in this area with a bit of help from all of us.” 

Follow up by making yourself easily available with emails, phone calls, letters home to keep everyone informed of progress made or further difficulties. Remember that parents are sensitive where their child is concerned. So tread as lightly as you can. Be diplomatic and choose your words well.

 Of course, as we all know, there are some students and parents who are an added challenge. We have to try harder and have almost limitless patience. Tact is the word here.  If Elizabeth’s mom is defensive and becomes confrontational, it is up to you to diffuse this anger. Speak calmly,  DON’T raise your voice, REMEMBER, you are a  professional. 

I have had parents come in, very upset about a grade, or thinking that I was unfair, or that I hurt their child’s feelings. If something akin to this occurs, break the ice by saying something that lets them know you hear their complaint and are prepared to work with them in correcting it.

                      You could say:

“I am so sorry that Elizabeth believes I don’t like her, not my intention at all. As a matter of fact I like her a great deal, especially her jokes, she keeps me laughing. She received a low grade on her  test because"...Give your reasons for the negative grade. Make sure the parent understands your reasoning and reassure them that you are here for their child and want to see them succeed in this class.

The parent is satisfied, I’m feeling better about what has occurred and we’ve strengthened our relationship. As you can see, a bit of understanding, empathy and kindness goes a long way.

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Deann

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New Beginnings, An Organized Middle School Classroom

By Deann Marin at the Best of Teacher Entrepreneurs III

Offering for Educators, Comprehensive Teaching Aides.

If you'd like to see what else I have to offer please visit my store

It seems like every year, summer vacation goes quicker and quicker and before we know it, school comes a calling.  What I’ve always liked about teaching is that each year is a new beginning.  What happened last year is in the past and I’m always so happy to meet my new charges. New challenges, new things to teach, new things to learn, different methods and programs keep my teaching fresh.  I’m going to share some of the things that I do to organize my classroom into the best environment for learning.

Here are some tips that I've used and they’ve been quite successful.  We have two main groups of 25-30 students each. Before school my partner and I take a look at the comments from last year's teachers. We then set the children up into groups according to their grades as well as their strengths and weaknesses. We come up with  creative names for them such as: Greeks and Romans, Black and Blue, or we ask them what they’d like their group to be named and we take a vote. The kids really like to pick their own names. Of course we change them each year because we don’t want the kids to know which is the higher or lower group.

I’m a great proponent of Collaborative learning, so I set up my classroom accordingly. It works quite well for what I want to do.

I like my students to work in groups of four so  I make two rows of horseshoes. Two members of the group are in the front, the other two sit in back of them. So when it is time for group work, the front row only has to turn their desk around to face the other two. Of course this takes a little bit of practice, but they eventually get it. When we begin group work it can get noisy so I have to remind them to use inside voices, I might also hold up a finger,  ring a little bell, or hold up a QUIET sign  to let them know they need to quiet down a bit.

Groups are composed of one high level child, two with average ability and one lower level child. I also try to have 2 boys and 2 girls in each group. That way there is diversity in abilities and they can all help each other. I found that the best arrangement for groups is no more than 4 so if I have 25 students I will make 6 groups of 4 and one with 5.  Each group remains the same for one semester, and then we rotate. We would change groups 4 times throughout the year since we had 4 semesters. I liked having them work together for at least two months, getting to know each other, cooperating and allowing each child a chance to be heard.  Of course there are always one or two kids that have a hard time working with others.  If that occurs, you might pull them from the group and have them work on their own, esp if they are disruptive, until they can prove that they are able to work within a group. Setting up the rotations takes a bit of  work since you don’t want to have the same kids in the group more than once.  

Like most school, we use a computer grading system, but, I’m a little old fashioned and like a hard copy of my grades. It’s easier to write them in my trusty grade book and then transfer them to the computer. Also, if a parent or student wants to see their grade, I find it easier to just show them the book.

1. Split book in half with a section for each group. Glue or tape

    list of type written names of students in each group into

    their designated section.

2. Label both sections with English, and Social Studies.

     For ex: Roman group: First Semester, Label the tab

    with Language arts. Count 4 pages for Language Arts,

     4 pages for Social Studies. Then do the same for

     the other group Greeks. Make sure there are

     enough pages for all of the semesters.

3.  When you finish with one semester, fold back or cut

     the pages on dotted line so you can see the

     students names. Label the  new page with 2nd

     semester, and so on.   One picture speaks 1000 words,

     so please take a look at the images of my grade book.

                                                              

Bulletin boards are next, I decorate one for social studies and language arts which I change each semester for some variety. I have a checklist for book reports, Computer Dos and Don’ts, Quotes to discuss, a rewards board and classroom rules.

Before I drift off to sleep the night before my students arrive, I can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that my room is set up. I'm now ready to dive into another exciting and rewarding school year.

Image Credits

https://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Store/Watson-Works

https://www.teacherspayteachers.com/Store/The-3am-Teacher

http://www.whimsyclips.com/

Thanks for stopping by

 Deann

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This post is part of our Sharing is Caring Teacher Blogging Collaborative. Read about  how these veteran teachers approach the beginning of the school year.

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